Well, I guess the last journal I made was 5 months ago, when I moved out of my mother's house. I've been pretty much been busy with things. I just been highly active on drawing and playing SWTOR. I mean with Knights Of The Fallen Empire came out with each chapter every month, its been exciting and fun. I just been pretty much focus on other things in RL. Bills, food shopping, cleaning the usual.
*sigh* I've been thinking about going back to Second Life to be a honey badger, but I got to buy the mod kit and the avatar in order for me to be one. I think I have clothes for my honey badger that I usually buy for my Kemono or that other avatar I can't think of. But at the same time, I've been dreading on the idea on returning to it. Don't get me wrong, I love furries but the thing I worried about is being IMed immediately as soon I'm online. I left the box unchecked to show my friend's that I'm online. To add to that note, I'm constantly gonna get nagged by virtual dicks flailing about whenever I'm in a mood to sit n chat with my friends. Not to be a commendable sex object whenever I'm trying to be normal. Sure, I will tell them off, but I'll be boring because I'm not going to be the fun sexual gal that they adore so much. I just want to talk about random shit.
Well, I know for a fact I'm boring to talk to. Hell, take my husband for example. He doesn't even continue the conversation whenever I wanted to talk. I pissed him off talking about a game. In a Phoenix Wright game, there's a scene where the brother has a lil brother who is brain dead at the hospital. Letting him be hospitalized knowing for the fact that his brother will not come out of a coma due to the incident that happen in the circus. I feel that the more I talk the less likely the conversation is not gonna go nowhere. Which is why, I suck at starting conversation. Most of the things I say never goes anywhere. I just state my opinion or statement on something I just watch and just move on. I feel that my husband is getting bored of me because I'm not interesting to talk to. At times, I feel alone.
Your probably wondering, ' Don't you have friends to talk to? Do you have a skype account? Do you join chat websites or roleplay with someone?'
I do. But most of the friends I made are highly busy with things. Never pay attention or bother to continue the conversation when I speak up. No one plays the game I play. They rp whenever I'm not in a mood and often times forget. Other's clinged to me like I'm some live sex object for them to play with. I don't mind friends with benefits, but I like to be treated like a person afterwards and not a mindless sex drone. Plus, I just feel mostly ignored and would end up listening to conversation anyway. It got to the point where I listen the most and not say nothing. Just a subtle response of , '' Mmhm '' and '' Nah uh.'' or my infamous, ' Hmmm' replies.
Oh, expect more artwork and the continuation of the comic that I'm slowly working on and surely neglecting to finish. That's all.
Listening to: Neon Genesis Evangelion Death & Rebirth - Tamashii